“Who wants to wipe me,” my younger son yells? If neither my wife nor I instantly appear, he yells again, “Somebody wipe me!” My older son will walk into my room – does he even know the word knock – and tell me, “You can get me a snack. I want pretzels, cut apple, and juice please.” As soon as his order is placed, he turns on his heels and heads back to his room. Ahh, my children are so good to me. They are such givers – making me a proud pop.
I know, I know they are at ages (5 & 7) where they only understand things as they relate to them especially when they are watching television. Sample conversation with the children while they are watching television – “Boys I don’t feel well.” Silence. “I have a head ache. I don’t feel well!!!” “Oh,” they respond. “Say feel better,” I instruct. Silence. I raise my voice, “Say it, say it, say feel better.” They manage to get out a, “feel better.” Then a commercial comes on and their conversational skills are revived, “What’s for dinner?” Empathy baby, empathy.
The children suck up money, wake up early, leave a mess around the house, monopoloize the television and computer, and disturb the peace and quiet. Pride and joy man, pride and joy. Logic question if I may: What are they good for? I don’t mean that they might have to care for me when I am elderly, or mow the lawn/shovel the snow, carry in a package from the grocery store though that would be nice. I mean what are they good for now? I want some return on my time, emotional commitment, and money. I don’t think that is too much to ask for – reasonable actually.
I’ve found something – not quite a Columbus like find, so, no chance for a national holiday with this discovery. However, I believe parents around the world will appreciate this. My children are human heating blankets. They are always warm. So, when my hands or nose are cold, which they often are, I go to my children. I take them in for a hug and make sure to rub my nose on them or stick my hands on their necks. “Hey, you’re so cold,” they whine. “I know and you’re so warm. I need your warmth. Come here let me hug you one more time.” I grab them one more time and steal some warmth and make sure to tickle them, so they don’t mind my frigidness all that much.
So, these children actually do have something to offer. Some day they will be self-sufficient, and one day further down the line may have to take care of me. However, for now I’ll take their warmth and be happy for the heat.