He Should Be An Author

He Should Be an Author: Dads Behaving Dadly 2He should be an author. That’s what Adele Springsteen said to her son Bruce.

How do I know this? Well, Bruce Springsteen told me. Really, he did.

You see during his earlier days, Bruce Springsteen was apt to stop in the middle of a song. The music would slow down and Bruce would share a story. The story might be funny or serious or a combination of the two. Some were true while some were probably less so. Either way, he would tie the story to the song.

Growin’ Up

Anyway, one of these stoppages occurred during the song Growin’ Up at The Roxy Theatre in West Hollywood, CA on July 7th, 1978.  This song and story were memorialized as they became part of the album, Live 75-85.

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Even Dreamers Have Responsibilities

Children, ResponsibilitiesIt’s 6:00 am and my mother is out of the house.  Like the postman, rain or snow does not stop her from going to work.

It’s night time, and my father is not home. It’s tax season, and the CPA and sole proprietor is at work – maybe even pulling an all-nighter.

Fill in the blank: Children = ______. Millions of responses could go in that blank. I hope love, joy, and optimistic are on that list somewhere.

There is one word that absolutely must be on the list and that is responsibility.

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PURSUING A DREAM: NO MORE SCHOOL BELLS

DreamsI know you have dreams. Maybe, you’re pursuing and accomplishing them. Maybe you consciously gave up on them and moved on. Or maybe your dreams have fallen by the wayside because, well, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans,” as John Lennon said in Beautiful Boy.

It was the early to mid-90’s, and I was in the middle of my traveling years. This was a special time for me. You might say I found myself though I never knew I was lost.

On Columbus Day weekend, a couple of friends and I decided to rent a cottage in Lake George, NY.  We sat by the lake, fished, rented a canoe, and just hung out. We also partook in some substances.

The next morning when my head stopped spinning, I was sitting on the porch in my underwear. The rest of my clothes were wet. Don’t ask me how – I have no idea. One of my buddies – EI – and I were talking about our dreams, goals, and where we saw ourselves in the future. I forget EI’s response. Hey, it had been a crazy night. Yet, I remember what I said, “I want to have a piece of my writing published by the time I’m 30.”

I never submitted anything to a publisher.

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Missing Youth

“We’re not gonna take it. No, we ain’t gonna take it. We’re not gonna take it anymore,” Twisted Sister.

Eurorail train schedules, Let’s Go Europe, and maps surrounded the unemployed 23 year old. He was planning out his backpacking through Europe summer. Responsibility and reality be damned. The epitome of freedom and youth.

“Larry,” my father shouted as he came into my room undetected.

I jumped, “Oh, hi dad.’

“Does the music have to be so loud?”

“Sorry.” I turned down the music.

“What is all the stuff,” he motioned at the paraphernalia that decorated my floor.

“Planning my summer trip.”

“Oh.” He shook his head, half smiled, and walked away after reminding me to keep the music lower.

I looked at the information around me, contemplated my looming weeks long trip, and considered my unemployed status. I felt guilty. Then, I got over it.

Yesterday, I was assisting a girl with her college application essay. During the tutoring session, she started talking to her mother. “Mommy,” she said “I am going create an empire.” She was certain that the business she had recently begun was bound for big things. I raised my eyebrows but said nothing. Her mother smiled a yes dear smile. The girl bubbled on so proud of her declaration that she wrote it down.

Another college recruiter visited my senior class. He talked about his school and how attending there will enable the students to achieve their academic goals. This of course will enable them to fulfill their dreams. Never mind the 70 average.

“I’m happy she is getting a chance to go away,” she explained. “But when I dropped her off, I felt a little jealous.”  So my fellow writer said at a recent writer’s group meeting. She clearly felt a little guilty. There was no need to apologize as the rest of us – parents with children in various stages – shook our heads feeling the same such feelings.

It’s not youth we want. It’s the unbound enthusiasm. It’s the certainty that everything is not only possible but a mere question of when.

I wish good things for my tutee, my students, and my co-writer’s daughter. I hope they achieve big and great things. They are in an amazing and exciting stage in their lives.

By the time you reach a certain age, there is some level of stuckness (I know it’s not a word, but it so fits). Whatever you’re level of contentment – nice family, decent job, comfortable home – choices have been made, life is being lived, and dreams come in size small.

The world is not our oyster. It’s not free for the taking. As adults, we know this. Lumps can and will be doled out. I, for one, am okay with that. I will cope and be happy for the dreams of the kids around me, hopeful about fulfilling my goals, and content with the wisdom I have gained.