All Males Here

The other night my wife and I watched the movie This is 40. It’s a decent move that had some funny lines and a few parts that we could relate to.  The movie focuses on a family of four made up of a husband, wife and two daughters.

Movie poster image courtesy of Google

Movie poster image courtesy of Google

During one scene, Pete (husband/father) is feeling left out and frustrated as his wife and daughters are dancing along to some pop music which he despises. So, Pete plays his music and starts dancing to it. The females of the family are clearly uninterested and want it off.  Pete says, “Sometimes, I wish just one of you had a dick.”

I turned to my wife and asked her about our male dominant family, “Do you ever wish there was another vagina in our family?” She answered without hesitation, “Yup.”

I laughed.

“What is that noise? Are you trying to poop back there?”

SJ shook his head, “No. Can you open this?”  He handed me a tupperware cup full of juice. Damn muscle tone issues.

“Oh, that’s better. It really did sound like you were trying to make a poop. Didn’t it?” BR and I were laughing.

SJ started kicking my seat. He thought I was making fun of him. I wasn’t.  “I’m just joking. Relax!”

“Hey Daddy, remember that Lightning McQueen game?”  BR said. He was referring to a handheld game that my wife got the boys a while back to play in the car. Very educational – you can learn about geography and national landmarks. While playing the game recently, BR & I noticed another feature that tops its educational value. When Lightning McQueen crashes, it sounds like he is farting.

Lightning McQueen photo courtesy of Google.

Lightning McQueen photo courtesy of Google.

“Of course I remember.”

“Remember how it sounds like Lightning is farting? It’s funny, right?”

“Uh huh.  Hey, I have an idea. Turn the game on so that it will make the farting noises. SJ, when you see me wave my hand, you make that noise you were making before.”

The next minute our orchestra was in perfect pitch. Lawrence Welk has nothing on me. The boys and I were cackling away.

“Hey, do you guys think mommy would find this funny?” I asked. “Nah. Women and girls don’t really find this sort of stuff funny.”

BR and SJ were not interested in a conversation about the differences between men and women. All they could say was, “Do it again, do it again!”

Sorry, honey.


34 thoughts on “All Males Here

  1. That’s awesome! Being the mom of a boy I’ve learned how funny bodily functions are… it totally freaks my mom out, though. She hates when we laugh and joke about bodily functions!

    • That’s cool that you can enjoy that sort of thing. Thanks for visiting our side. Your mom needs to relax.

  2. Great post. I’m so glad things are divided evenly in my house. I’m not sure I could handle being outnumbered by the “testoster-zone”.

    • I guess you are lucky. You would adjust. However, I think my wife might enjoy a little less testorterone here. Yet, boys we got an boys she loves.

  3. Hehe…that’s a good one. Sounds just like my family. I have two girls. When my hubby said he wanted a
    boy in the house, the answer will be “You have a furry boy outside.” We have a Rottweiler *(^____^)*

  4. Okay, I try not to be a person who is forever making my friends follow links, but I have another one for you.

    Oh mercy, did I laugh. And then I made Eric read it, and even though he tried not to laugh he couldn’t help it. His comment at the end was, “Farts are not the big deal to men that they are to women. We just don’t care.” Your post proves the point again!

  5. I, like your wife, am surrounded by males. Even our damn cat is a boy! Most of the times I’m happy about it, but sometimes, like the one you describe here, I do wish I had a little female companionship.

  6. See….now I am the one usually making inappropriate jokes like that while my husband sits on the sidelines shaking his head! I can’t say I have ever made an entire orchestra of it though! My boys would love that!

  7. ha!ha! 🙂 too funny! when we watched that movie; I told my husband “I wish we had a girl here”, I’m surrounded by boys all day (Nate, hubby and my two male dogs!) ah! 😉

  8. I happen to think that fart and poop jokes are hilarious. And Yitzchak has learned to like these jokes, and make them, because they make me laugh.
    I learned this humor from my little brother, who was ten years old when I left home. I have a feeling that he has grown up somewhat and left me behind.

    • He probably has. However, does not mean that he still wont find fart and poop jokes funny. They don’t get old.

  9. For a long time I had my sweet boy trained that you don’t say the “f” word, you say “passed gas” instead. Then my husband ruined that. Guys, I swear.

    • You are welcome. You think your son would have said that by the third day of kindergarten. Your husband saved him looking like a geek. Thank him.

  10. That was just funny …..
    One day, I’m going to drop Jake off at your house for the weekend so he can spend an entire weekend participating in your noise orchestra. I think he’ll fit right in 🙂

  11. Alexi was out numbered for several years here; living with his mom, sister and grandma. Every once in a while he would profess his desire for male companionship. Poor guy. lol

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