My website is on Viagra. Well, to be more clear, Viagra is on my website.
The other night my wife and I watched the movie This is 40. It’s a decent move that had some funny lines and a few parts that we could relate to. The movie focuses on a family of four made up of a husband, wife and two daughters.
During one scene, Pete (husband/father) is feeling left out and frustrated as his wife and daughters are dancing along to some pop music which he despises. So, Pete plays his music and starts dancing to it. The females of the family are clearly uninterested and want it off. Pete says, “Sometimes, I wish just one of you had a dick.”
I turned to my wife and asked her about our male dominant family, “Do you ever wish there was another vagina in our family?” She answered without hesitation, “Yup.”
“What is that noise? Are you trying to poop back there?”
SJ shook his head, “No. Can you open this?” He handed me a tupperware cup full of juice. Damn muscle tone issues.
“Oh, that’s better. It really did sound like you were trying to make a poop. Didn’t it?” BR and I were laughing.
SJ started kicking my seat. He thought I was making fun of him. I wasn’t. “I’m just joking. Relax!”
“Hey Daddy, remember that Lightning McQueen game?” BR said. He was referring to a handheld game that my wife got the boys a while back to play in the car. Very educational – you can learn about geography and national landmarks. While playing the game recently, BR & I noticed another feature that tops its educational value. When Lightning McQueen crashes, it sounds like he is farting.
“Of course I remember.”
“Remember how it sounds like Lightning is farting? It’s funny, right?”
“Uh huh. Hey, I have an idea. Turn the game on so that it will make the farting noises. SJ, when you see me wave my hand, you make that noise you were making before.”
The next minute our orchestra was in perfect pitch. Lawrence Welk has nothing on me. The boys and I were cackling away.
“Hey, do you guys think mommy would find this funny?” I asked. “Nah. Women and girls don’t really find this sort of stuff funny.”
BR and SJ were not interested in a conversation about the differences between men and women. All they could say was, “Do it again, do it again!”