It’s Me

Frustrated Man Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Frustrated Man Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I’ve had better weekends.

It wasn’t the weather. It wasn’t the plans. It wasn’t the company.

It was me. I’d like to blame someone or something else. Yet, what good would that do?

Everybody and everything got on my nerves.

SJ and his constant chatter were not cute. At all. He was annoying. Just shut up already.  Try playing a game where you need to concentrate (Rummikub) when your opponent is a 6.5 year old who does not stop talking. On top of that, he overflowed the toilet today because of his excessive use of wipes.

BR argued with his brother for hours on end about nothing. He went through periods of the day when he called SJ stupid, idiot, and fat every few moments.  I spoke with BR explaining that this is not how he should be dealing with his brother. BR’s disregard for my instructions and viciousness towards his brother upset and frustrated me. How many times can you repeat yourself, and get no reaction to your instructions and not feel annoyed?

Ms. MMK did not get it. When we did talk, we were in separate books – forget about pages. Imagine getting in the car to run errands including one where the vital information is written down. Walking out of the house, I said to my wife, “No. I don’t know what we have to get. It’s written down. I’ll go out to the car while you grab the information.” Fast forward to the car and my wife asks, “So, you know what we need to get, right?”  Didn’t we just discuss this?

There were other people and situations that frustrated and annoyed me. I’ll spare you the details.

Nothing that happened or did not happen this weekend was urgent or life shattering. It really was the little things or the small things. Yes, I’ve heard of the book and get the idea of, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.”

I’d like to blame others. I’d like to blame lack of sleep. I’d like to blame something.

The summer is moving along, and I am anxious to accomplish some goals that I set for myself. I’ve made some progress, but not nearly what I wanted. In other words, I am falling short. It feels like failing. Uncertainty is creeping in.

I need to step back. I must be honest about my progress and what is realistic. I need some solutions. However, the first thing I have to do is find some patience and recognize what matters and what I can control.

For my sake. And for the sake of those around me.

30 thoughts on “It’s Me

  1. I’m sorry, that sounds like a very rough weekend – I hate that you had to go through that. It’s hard when you have days (weekends) like that where everything drives you nuts and nothing seems to go right! I hope that this week goes better for you!

    • It wasn’t the greatest weekend. However, it was my issues more than anything else. Driving me nuts was the theme of the weekend.
      Having some space today has been good for me.

  2. sorry you were feeling like this but I understand you, it’s happening to me now a little bit more often than I want, don’t know why it happens
    just hope this week will be better for you Larry! 🙂

  3. I panicked when I realized summer vacation is half over and I haven’t accomplished any of the things I had “plenty of time” to do during break. And I have to say I am completely done with the bickering. Now they get one warning where I tell them their choices: work it out or go to separate rooms. If it continues I cancel whatever the next activity they were looking forward to is. (Hmmmm, I seem to be a little irritable myself!!!)

    • I hate the bickering!
      No, it’s not half over. Don’t say that. We are still in July. July is a beautiful month. Let’s try and enjoy the last two days.
      Anyway, you do seem a bit irritable. Welcome to the club.

  4. Unfortunately, we all have these days (or weekends). When I’m in that place, I usually need some frivolous fun and downtime. (Or a good cry!) Maybe a Larry playdate or a date night with your wife is in order? Good for you for shifting your attention to what matters!

    • Thanks for your understanding.
      I had some time alone today that was helpful. It didn’t involve any crying, but I enjoyed it.

  5. I hear ya! I keep telling my kids that their bickering is really hurting them. The more arguments I have to break up the less energy or willingness I have to do something fun with them! It’s driving me nuts because they just don’t get it! Here’s to a better week for you!

  6. Sounds like you need a good and long night sleep. Always works for me when I’m angry at the world for no good reason.

    • Sleep is the cure to so many issues.
      In this case having some space on Monday helped.
      Thanks for the suggestion.

  7. I get that feeling. I think that’s what happened to me when I started to get the writer’s block. I was disappointed with myself for not getting as much done as I wanted to this summer. We’re less than 2 weeks before school starts so my summer is pretty much over BUT you … give yourself a break and enjoy those last few weeks of being home alone. And spend that time going to the bathroom with the door open for the WHOLE day 🙂

    • Oh wow. I don’t think I could handle that much joy. I actually just got some good news (I’ll email you). Anyway, clearing my head out and reassessing is a good thing. I don’t want to get into a funk.
      Having some space on Monday helped a lot!

  8. Deep breathes, friend. Deep breathes. I’ve been learning to try to keep my patience with the kids, but it’s SO hard sometimes. And I’m not at all good about holding my tongue with my husband. That shopping list scenario would definitely have made me mad. Stuff like that happens a lot here. Ah, life. What can you do sometimes? Except perhaps remember the immortal words of Anne of Green Gables: Tomorrow is a new day, with no mistakes in it yet. 🙂

    • Wise words from Anne. Thanks for sharing and your empathy.
      Deep breathes are good and getting space was even better.

  9. We’ve had the crabbies in our house, too! There is nothing specifically wrong, but we feel all grouchy and short tempered. It sounds like it’s going around the country. 🙂

  10. Funny, that’s exactly how I’ve felt all day today. Just a little off. Hope you’re able to get back “on” sooner rather than later.

    • Having some space earlier in the week was very helpful. I do feel better. Thanks. I hope you can say the same soon.

  11. My patience is often very thin. It’s hard when everything seems to go awry and everyone is grating on you. It’s hard to accomplish anything and not just mope about in frustration which often means that you get frustrated at yourself and the loop continues.

    Best of luck accomplishing your summer goals!

    • Too often I lack in patience. My mind will be zooming and when others are not on my pace, I can get frustrated. Not a good place.
      Thanks for the good wishes.

  12. Larry, I get to feeling like this too. I think it all leads back to my greatest challenge, which is my failure to be in the moment. I’m always thinking past the moment and wrestling with what I have to do, what I should have done, if only I could get done. My fear is that I will reach the end of my days and look back to see a flood of moments that I couldn’t enjoy. I’m working on it. I’ve actually Googled “how to be in the moment”. Found a good article in Psychology Today that gave concrete suggestions.

    I hope this weekend goes better for you!

    • You say it so well. I can be like this too – struggling to be in a moment. Can you send me the link to that article?
      I actually have a had a good week but I still would like to see the article.

      • Sure, here it is: http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200810/the-art-now-six-steps-living-in-the-moment.

        You can also Google how to live in the moment and you will find a lot of articles devoted to the topic. Apparently it’s a common problem.

        I sometimes struggle with negative thoughts (whether they be stressing over what I have to get done or stewing over something from the past) and have found two suggestions that help. One is to envision a huge STOP sign, the other is to drink a glass of cold water. Along with these actions comes a conscious decision to stream my thoughts in a different direction.

        • The stop sign and drink of water sound good. Sometimes just moving around and being conscious of what I am doing helps me.

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